Second Fiddle

For most of my boys' life, they have been very attached to Mommy.  Chris has suffered through many times of hearing both boys say " I want Mommy to do it"  "I don't want Mommy to go, you go" "Just Mommy can hold my hand".  I have sympathized and often longed for the day when I had a little more space.  Well, it seems that day has come with Austin, but it is not what I thought it might be.  Austin and I have had lots of head-butting lately.  It often feels like he will not respond well to requests to obey and at times he has been disrespectful.  I have also been much busier with Lucy's arrival and the large amounts of time needed to feed and care for a newborn.  So the other day Austin asked me "Mommy why are you always mad at me?'  Ouch. That made my heart really sad and so after a day or so I asked him why he thought I was always mad and I apologized for coming across that way.

I thought we were reconciling well and initiated planning a date with Austin.  His response was "when can I have a date with Daddy?  I like dates with Daddy better than you".  I was a little sad to hear that but tried not to dwell on it.  Than he said "And I like Daddy better than you."  This one was harder to take and I was feeling rather sad.  He said Daddy was more fun than me and "because he is a boy and stronger than you".  Well, that is certainly true and I think as Austin gets older he is relating to Daddy more and they have more in common (wrestling, funny jokes, lots of physical play).  I am thrilled in many ways that Austin loves his Daddy and that Chris' "turn" has finally come with Austin.  But, I was still a little sad to hear those words.  Chris assured me..."Don't worry, Bennett still prefers you over me".  Ha.  In any case, I am now playing second fiddle to Chris with Austin. Chris left for a trip today and Austin asked why I couldn't go instead and Daddy stay home?  Hopefully Austin and I will have a good time together while Chris is gone and have more one on one this month during his winter vacation from school. But for now, Daddy is king around here :)