March 5

March 5 did not come quietly for my family.  It marked the one year anniversary of my grandfather's death, a day of remembering a wonderful man we loved.  And as we reflected on his life and our loss, we joyfully welcomed a new member into the family, Eliza Grace.  We rejoice with my sister Charlotte and John as they welcome this precious little one to the world.

But all is not as it should be.  We knew before her birth that she would be born with club feet, a condition that can usually be treated very successfully.  But the morning after her birth, doctors noted that she had low muscle tone that was affecting her ability to swallow among other things.  She has been moved to a Children's Hospital and is in the NICU while tests are done and results of what this could mean is waited for. There are many unknowns at this point, more unknowns than things known.  She was placed on a feeding tube though we rejoice that in the past couple of days she has taken a bottle and shown improvement in her swallowing.  

This was my favorite birthday card this year!

I cannot fully understand what Charlotte and John are experiencing, though as a mom of three I can certainly imagine.  In times like this when things are not as they should be, when the reality of a sin stained planet hits home more than usual, when questions arise that normally are shoved to the outer regions of my brain, I can only turn to the One who created Grace.  As are they, I know.  I can only pray Romans 8 over and over, even when I want to question it.  That our present sufferings cannot outweigh the glory to come.  The solace to come.  That He who did not spare his own Son will He not also graciously give us all things.  That He does work good out of bad, out of what should NOT be.  That if He is for us, who or what can be against us.  That NOTHING can separate us from His love.  Not trials or sickness or fear.  Even though sometimes I want to ask, "really?  Is that really true?"  Though there are moments in times like this when it feels less true, there are actually more for me that have felt more true.

Thanks to many of you who have been praying.  I ask you to continue praying.  Please pray for healing for Grace, for HIS grace to be upon her.  That her muscle tone would be completely restored.  For the ability to eat and breathe with no problems.  For the ability to breastfeed.  For results of many tests to come back quickly (some can take two weeks) and to be able to clearly understand what is going on and that it would be good news.  For strength for Charlotte and John, especially for Charlotte who just birthed a baby, today was running a fever, for freedom from anxiety, physical strength and ability to rest and know God's presence strongly.

Isn't she beautiful?